Writing, especially poetry, or my version of it, has always been my sanctuary. it’s been a canvas where the myriad colors of my emotions blend into vivid expressions of my journey. From the raw, unfiltered verses of my teenage years, where every line echoed the turbulence of loss, struggles and adolescence, to the more nuanced reflections of my recent experiences, each poem captures a distinct stage of my life.
Writing became my voice when words failed, a way to articulate feelings too complex for everyday conversation. As I look back on my writings, I notice a recurring theme of self-denial and a longing for self-love, a search for the eternal validation that I needed to discover within myself. I was so full of emotions and unsure how to handle them, and lived so much in fear that I couldn’t see that all I truly needed was to love me.
Through these verses, I’ve navigated love, loss, joy and self-discovery, each piece a snapshot of my evolving identity. This collection not only showcases my growth as a writer but also as an individual, revealing the intricate tapestry of who I am today. I’ve selected a few of my writings through the years to represent my journey and highlight the changes in my life. When I look back on my writings, I feel so much compassion and grace for each version of my past self. I am now coming to appreciate each stage and the strength it took to get to where I am.
Death Unexpected
1995
Life passes by so quickly,
One day you know someone,
The next day they’re gone,
Gone to a better place,
Full of God’s love.
We cry and we grieve,
But as hard as it may be,
We have to let go,
Tears seem never ending,
A precious life destroyed.
They will always be in our hearts,
They will never be forgotten,
They will always be missed,
We will pray that,
God takes care of them.
Lord
1997
Lord take my hand I pray to you,
Show me what I need to do,
Take away my pain and fright,
Guide me with your holy light.
Walk with me as days go by,
Hold me close when I need to cry,
If I fall, help me please,
I ask you this on bended knees.
Help me say no when I’m tempted to sin,
With my life am I able to win,
I’ve been away from you so long,
I didn’t mean to do so wrong.
Now I know that you are here,
I have not but a single fear,
The fear of being without your love,
And not being with you above.
I think back on my troubled past,
How long did I expect to last,
Without your love and joy untold,
Now I know the miracles you unfold,
Deep in my heart I know it’s true,
I am always a part of you.
Where I Belong
1998
Every time I come back here,
I just want to leave,
I really hate the feelings,
So bad I can’t believe,
I wish I could just find,
The place where I belong,
I need to get away,
I’ve been here too long,
So many bad memories,
Every where I go,
This place holds nothing for me,
I already know,
I try to put it past me,
But I just can’t forget,
I want to go around,
Instead I get caught in it,
I will run away someday,
And find where I belong,
I’ll find what I’m meant to do,
And these feelings will be gone.
Crystal
1999
Have you ever met my friend,
She’s nice to have but in the end,
She lets her evil side shine through,
Leaving you not knowing what to do,
She speeds you up and slows you down,
And you’ll never know when she’ll be around,
She turns you against the ones you trust,
You fall for the greed and then you lust,
And all the things you use to know,
Gets twisted around and mangled so,
You really don’t know the truth,
And there isn’t really any use,
Of trying to get it together again,
Until you drop my little friend,
Because she doesn’t care at all,
She builds you up and laughs when you fall,
She seems to be the perfect friend,
She tempts me in and I let her win,
Although I try and tell her no,
When she’s around I can’t let her go,
Crystal is a tempting soul,
She’s like the Devil so I know,
One of these days she’ll catch up to me,
After all the torture I’ll finally see,
No matter how hard I try,
I can’t even answer why,
I can’t say no to her,
Someday I’ll get out of the blur.
Wondering About the Future
2000
In the blink of an eye life changes,
In an instant time rearranges,
What was once new now is old,
All the mistakes left to be told,
The future still lies ahead,
Questions forming in your head,
What is going to happen next,
Not wanting to risk the bet,
If you’re wrong what is right,
Will your dreams be in your sight,
Are thing going to work out,
So much hope but so much doubt,
Left to wonder who will be there,
So unsure if anyone cares.
I Pray
2000
I pray God watches over you,
And guides you every day,
That He holds out His hand,
To help you find your way.
I pray He takes care of you,
When the path is hard to find,
That He opens up new doors,
And shuts hard times behind.
I pray God brings you happiness,
When you feel alone,
That He keeps you close by,
When your standing on your own.
I pray He gives you sunshine,
To brighten every day,
That He gives to you true love,
That will always stay.
I pray God gives you friendships,
The true and lasting kind,
That He blesses the ones you have,
For true friends are hard to find.
These are all my prayers for you,
Because you are my friend,
I pray we grow in Christ,
And our friendship never ends.
Uncertainty
2002
Trapped in constant darkness,
The past never far behind,
I look for signs of light,
I’m about to lose my mind,
God is out there somewhere,
Maybe far away,
I wipe away another tear,
And bow my head to pray,
The suddenly out of the shadows,
I see a face unclear,
I feel the peace wrap around,
I know that God is near,
From then on out I travel,
No fear upon my face,
All see is light,
My world is full of peace.
Feel free to share your own works of art here!! I love seeing people’s artistry and passion!